Official joke thread

Snow · 02-13-2006, 09:36 PM

Post jokes

A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life. "Wow, this is great," he thought. It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight: lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.

Hey," he called. "I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've just escaped. Are you wild rabbits?"

"Yes. Come and join us," they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good. "What else do you wild rabbits do?" he asked. "Well," one of them said. "You see that field there? It's got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them." This he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful. Later, he asked them again, "What else do you do?"

"You see that field there? It's got lettuce growing in it. We eat them as well." The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later completely full. "Is there anything else you guys do?" he asked. One of the other rabbits came a bit closer to him and spoke softly. "There's one other thing you must try. You see those rabbits there," he said, pointing to the far corner of the field. "They're girls. We shag them. Go and try it." Well, our friend spent the rest of the morning screwing his little heart out until, completely knackered, he staggered back over to the guys. "That was fantastic," he panted. "So are you going to live with us then?" one of them asked. "I'm sorry, I had a great time but I can't." The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised. "Why? We thought you liked it here."

"I do," our friend replied. "But I must get back to the laboratory. I'm dying for a cigarette."

MrNaPaLm32 · 02-13-2006, 09:46 PM

heres one!!! your e-penis is very small!!!

Zetex · 02-13-2006, 09:48 PM

How was breakdancing created?

Black people stealing hubcaps off moving cars

MrNaPaLm32 · 02-13-2006, 10:30 PM

that was a little funny. it just doesnt make sense though

Zetex · 02-13-2006, 10:31 PM

makes plenty of sense
all break dancing is, is people rolling around and stuff, and thats what grabbing a hubcap on a moving car would cause

and u never see a white guy breakdancing

02-13-2006, 10:45 PM

Why do farts smell??

SO DEAF PEOPLE CAN ENJOY THEM TOO!
Highlight for answer!^^

Snow · 02-14-2006, 04:07 PM

Why don't people understand that jokes are supposed to be funny and not retarded.

Ryu-Nacho · 02-14-2006, 06:18 PM

Three guys are watching the game, when one of them speaks up about his wife. "I think my wife is screwing a plumber!"
"What makes you say that?" The second man asked.
"I came home the other day, and found a wrench under my bed!"
"Well, I think my wife is screwing an electrician. I found some wiring under my bed the other day."
The third guy leans foraward, and looks at them. "I think my wife is cheating on me with a horse!"
The first two men looked at him, stupified. "A horse?"
"Yeah! The other day, I found a jockey under my bed!"

02-14-2006, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ryu-Nacho

Three guys are watching the game, when one of them speaks up about his wife. "I think my wife is screwing a plumber!"
"What makes you say that?" The second man asked.
"I came home the other day, and found a wrench under my bed!"
"Well, I think my wife is screwing an electrician. I found some wiring under my bed the other day."
The third guy leans foraward, and looks at them. "I think my wife is cheating on me with a horse!"
The first two men looked at him, stupified. "A horse?"
"Yeah! The other day, I found a jockey under my bed!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Snow · 02-14-2006, 07:15 PM

New rule, you have to post a joke in every post you make, don't just make one saying HAHAHAHAHA!.

God said to Adam, "I've got some good news and some bad news. First the good news. I have given you a brain and a penis. The bad news... I've only given you enough blood to work one of them at a time!"

Ryu-Nacho · 02-15-2006, 06:22 PM

Three old women are sitting on a bench, enjoying each other's company. Suddenly, a man walks up and flashes them. Two of the women immediately had a stroke; the third woman, however, was too weak and fragile to reach that far.

02-15-2006, 08:48 PM

Why is phonetics spelled with a "ph" instead of an "f"?

If corn oil is made of corn, then what's baby oil made of?

Two men walk into a bar and buy everyone drinks. Someone asks "what's the occasion?"
One man says, "We just finished a jig-saw puzzle!"
"It took us 7 months," the other added proudly.
There was a silence in the bar for a while, untill the bartender asks, "why did it take that long?"
"Well, ya' see, the label on the box said 2-4 years!"

02-16-2006, 03:57 PM

My joke: Women's rights.

02-17-2006, 03:43 AM

Two little children were sitting at a park.
The little boy points at the girl and says "whats that?"
The girl says " I don't know"
then the little girl points at the boy and says "Whats that?"
The little boy replies with "I don't know"
So that night the little boy goes to his dad " Dad whats this?"
His dad replies with "Thats your pink porche. Your aloud to park that in any garage you like."
The little girl goes to her mum " Mum whats this?"
Her mum says " Thats your garage. Don't let any pink porches in there"

The next day the girl came home from playing with the boy in the park. Her mum saw all the blood on her hands and said "Darling! Are you hurt?!? What happened?"
The little girl shook her head and said " The pink porche tried to go in my garage so i ripped his back wheels off"

02-13-2006, 09:36 PM	#1
Snow 19th President Local Time: 03:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 5,785 Casino Cash: $27723	Official joke thread Post jokes A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life. "Wow, this is great," he thought. It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight: lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass. Hey," he called. "I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've just escaped. Are you wild rabbits?" "Yes. Come and join us," they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good. "What else do you wild rabbits do?" he asked. "Well," one of them said. "You see that field there? It's got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them." This he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful. Later, he asked them again, "What else do you do?" "You see that field there? It's got lettuce growing in it. We eat them as well." The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later completely full. "Is there anything else you guys do?" he asked. One of the other rabbits came a bit closer to him and spoke softly. "There's one other thing you must try. You see those rabbits there," he said, pointing to the far corner of the field. "They're girls. We shag them. Go and try it." Well, our friend spent the rest of the morning screwing his little heart out until, completely knackered, he staggered back over to the guys. "That was fantastic," he panted. "So are you going to live with us then?" one of them asked. "I'm sorry, I had a great time but I can't." The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised. "Why? We thought you liked it here." "I do," our friend replied. "But I must get back to the laboratory. I'm dying for a cigarette."

02-15-2006, 08:48 PM	#12
Fuzzie Fuzz Guest Tournaments Won: 1 Posts: n/a Casino Cash: $	Why is phonetics spelled with a "ph" instead of an "f"? If corn oil is made of corn, then what's baby oil made of? Two men walk into a bar and buy everyone drinks. Someone asks "what's the occasion?" One man says, "We just finished a jig-saw puzzle!" "It took us 7 months," the other added proudly. There was a silence in the bar for a while, untill the bartender asks, "why did it take that long?" "Well, ya' see, the label on the box said 2-4 years!" Last edited by Fuzzie Fuzz; 03-10-2006 at 11:04 PM. Reason: Because I said so!

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02-13-2006, 09:46 PM	#2
MrNaPaLm32 Banned Local Time: 11:31 AM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Reno 911 Age: 22 Posts: 5,158 Casino Cash: $19561	heres one!!! your e-penis is very small!!!

02-13-2006, 09:48 PM	#3
Zetex g-user Tournaments Won: 4 Local Time: 02:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 3,431 Casino Cash: $1354	How was breakdancing created? Black people stealing hubcaps off moving cars

02-13-2006, 10:30 PM	#4
MrNaPaLm32 Banned Local Time: 11:31 AM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Reno 911 Age: 22 Posts: 5,158 Casino Cash: $19561	that was a little funny. it just doesnt make sense though

02-13-2006, 10:31 PM	#5
Zetex g-user Tournaments Won: 4 Local Time: 02:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 3,431 Casino Cash: $1354	makes plenty of sense all break dancing is, is people rolling around and stuff, and thats what grabbing a hubcap on a moving car would cause and u never see a white guy breakdancing

02-13-2006, 10:45 PM	#6
bfchickenchaser Guest Tournaments Won: 1 Posts: n/a Casino Cash: $	Why do farts smell?? SO DEAF PEOPLE CAN ENJOY THEM TOO! Highlight for answer!^^

02-14-2006, 04:07 PM	#7
Snow 19th President Local Time: 03:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 5,785 Casino Cash: $27723	Why don't people understand that jokes are supposed to be funny and not retarded.

02-14-2006, 06:18 PM	#8
Ryu-Nacho G-Monarch Local Time: 02:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: A couple feet east of the center of the Earth. Age: 26 Posts: 4,708 Casino Cash: $2662	Three guys are watching the game, when one of them speaks up about his wife. "I think my wife is screwing a plumber!" "What makes you say that?" The second man asked. "I came home the other day, and found a wrench under my bed!" "Well, I think my wife is screwing an electrician. I found some wiring under my bed the other day." The third guy leans foraward, and looks at them. "I think my wife is cheating on me with a horse!" The first two men looked at him, stupified. "A horse?" "Yeah! The other day, I found a jockey under my bed!"

02-14-2006, 07:15 PM	#10
Snow 19th President Local Time: 03:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 5,785 Casino Cash: $27723	New rule, you have to post a joke in every post you make, don't just make one saying HAHAHAHAHA!. God said to Adam, "I've got some good news and some bad news. First the good news. I have given you a brain and a penis. The bad news... I've only given you enough blood to work one of them at a time!"

02-15-2006, 06:22 PM	#11
Ryu-Nacho G-Monarch Local Time: 02:31 PM Local Date: 05-21-2013 Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: A couple feet east of the center of the Earth. Age: 26 Posts: 4,708 Casino Cash: $2662	Three old women are sitting on a bench, enjoying each other's company. Suddenly, a man walks up and flashes them. Two of the women immediately had a stroke; the third woman, however, was too weak and fragile to reach that far.

02-16-2006, 03:57 PM	#13
uber_jedi Guest Tournaments Won: 1 Posts: n/a Casino Cash: $	My joke: Women's rights.


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02-17-2006, 03:43 AM	#14
Fooly.crazy Guest Tournaments Won: 1 Posts: n/a Casino Cash: $	Two little children were sitting at a park. The little boy points at the girl and says "whats that?" The girl says " I don't know" then the little girl points at the boy and says "Whats that?" The little boy replies with "I don't know" So that night the little boy goes to his dad " Dad whats this?" His dad replies with "Thats your pink porche. Your aloud to park that in any garage you like." The little girl goes to her mum " Mum whats this?" Her mum says " Thats your garage. Don't let any pink porches in there" The next day the girl came home from playing with the boy in the park. Her mum saw all the blood on her hands and said "Darling! Are you hurt?!? What happened?" The little girl shook her head and said " The pink porche tried to go in my garage so i ripped his back wheels off"