Child Abuse

[Nicky]

I just read "A Child Called 'IT'" yesterday and it's gotten me really thinking about, well, child abuse. So now I'm wondering, to you, what constitutes as child abuse?

I would write some long paragraph but my parents need the computer.

[Dudeo]

Pressuring them to get into Princeton. And not just in High School. I'm talking from conception.

[Drunken_Shinobi]

That's the Asian side of it...if the parents are totally stereotypically Asian. I'd say what 'constitutes' child abuse would be the fact that the parents themselves were subjected to abuse during their childhood and as a result they will turn around and abuse their own children and what not. I know it's a pretty common theory there...but that's one thing that seems to constitute it as well.

[happylittleClayFox]

I think it becomes abuse when there is noticeable physical/emotional trauma. Most of our parents torment their kids somehow, inflict some sort of trauma on their psyche. I think that's a part of the whole thing really and I don't mind that, but there is a cutoff point. When it becomes too consistent and doesn't even serve a purpose other than to use the child as some sort of whipping post, then it is abuse.

[Dudeo]

Originally Posted by Drunken_Shinobi

That's the Asian side of it...if the parents are totally stereotypically Asian. I'd say what 'constitutes' child abuse would be the fact that the parents themselves were subjected to abuse during their childhood and as a result they will turn around and abuse their own children and what not. I know it's a pretty common theory there...but that's one thing that seems to constitute it as well.

Actually, parents who were not abused as children are as likely to abuse their children as those who were. But you're right that it certainly plays some part in why they abuse their children.

As to the question at hand, I'd like to add that many parents believe that what constitutes abuse should be at their discretion, and not at anybody else's, including that of the children. They try to juggle what's best for themselves and for their children, and unavoidably some end up weighing their own happiness as more important than the child's, so they begin to condition or act towards the child in such a way that it glorifies their own position in the relationship, while still minimally keeping the child's needs at bay, so as to maximize their relative happiness. Tell me if this doesn't make sense the way I phrased it. Abuse is this imbalance between conditioning the child to act in a socially acceptable way and conditioning the child in such a way that the parent is satisfied at the expense of the child's functionality.

[happylittleClayFox]

When I went to go back to a different tab after opening this one I accidentally hit the Stumble button. It sent me to a page saying Happy Mother's Day. Curious.

[happylittleClayFox]

http://www.cagle.com/news/MothersDay07/1.asp

[Dudeo]

Clayfox, you just set up the most mind-blowing coincidence for me. One of those things where it's like there's no way. I can't describe it in words.

[happylittleClayFox]

You, sir, are quite welcome.

[Drunken_Shinobi]

Originally Posted by Dudeo

Actually, parents who were not abused as children are as likely to abuse their children as those who were. But you're right that it certainly plays some part in why they abuse their children.

I can agree with you on the fact that parents who weren't abused as kids are also likely to abuse their kids as well, and that's probably because those parents don't learn from the mistakes of their own parents when it comes to child abuse. Another thing I found out was that child abuse tends to happen more often in families that have younger parents.

[happylittleClayFox]

Do you think abuse is helped out by a lack of patience? I think that might even be true for aggressive behavior in general.