View Full Version : You know you're a redneck when...


Snow
08-30-2005, 02:15 PM
-You stand under the mistletoe at christmas and wait for granny and cousin sue ellen to walk by
-Your family tree doesn't branch out
-Your mother has been involved in a fistfight at a high school sports event
-Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed
-Your home has more miles on it than your car
-Your brother-in-law is your uncle
-The most commonly heard phrase at your family reunion is "What the hell are you looking at, ****head?"
-You have to go outside to get something out of the fridge
-Your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a six-pack
-You've been too drunk to fish
-Someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle
-Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare
-You have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance
-You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos
-Your wife weighs more then your refrigerator
-You mow your lawn and find a car
-If going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.
-Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.
-You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.
-It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it

bald muffin
08-30-2005, 04:52 PM
The incest stuff mentioned are disturbing. But the rest is all stereotypical fun.
Did you get these from Joe Foxworthy?

Firedove
08-30-2005, 05:33 PM
When you make a stupid joke(s).

Snow
08-30-2005, 10:08 PM
The incest stuff mentioned are disturbing. But the rest is all stereotypical fun.
Did you get these from Joe Foxworthy?

I actually got it from my friends AIM profile.

viper.gtsr
08-30-2005, 10:23 PM
what does LOL mean?!.

Snow
08-30-2005, 10:25 PM
what does LOL mean?!.

*silence*

Wow, I knew what it meant even before I had IM.

rehabisforquitters
08-31-2005, 01:55 AM
i think he's joking.....please tell me you're joking. YOU'RE JOKING RIGHT?

Snow
08-31-2005, 01:58 AM
I'll give you a hint:

When I see your spelling and grammer I LOL.

Rabbit face
08-31-2005, 02:59 AM
shame, he mite not know wat it means!! LOL = laugh out loud

i am NOT a redneck

Snow
08-31-2005, 03:01 AM
shame, he mite not know wat it means!! LOL = laugh out loud

i am NOT a redneck

Read the last bullet on my first post.

Rabbit face
08-31-2005, 04:45 AM
my bad

chikins r us
08-31-2005, 02:14 PM
You know when your a redneck when, you yell HOE DOWN!, and your wife hits the floor.

You know when your a redneck when, your grandmother can successfully execute the sleeper hold.

You know when your a redneck when, your lawn furnature used to be your living room furnature.

You know when your a redneck when, you have been married 6 times and still have the same in-laws

Jack92
09-04-2005, 12:59 PM
some redneck vids:

http://www.guzer.com/search.php?search_query=redneck

nickychris3
09-05-2005, 04:09 PM
If you know what redneck means...

If you call other people rednecks...

If you make a ton of redneck jokes...


(I must be a redneck then)

Led_Zeppelin
09-05-2005, 04:12 PM
I'll give you a hint:

When I see your spelling and grammer I LOL.

Grammar.


"LOL"

treefalse
09-05-2005, 08:13 PM
You migh be a red kneck if...

You lit a match in your bathroom and your house blew right off it's wheels.

Your form of entertainment is a bug zapper and a 6 pack.

You have a home that's moble, but 14 cars that aren't.

Junk_Train
09-12-2005, 02:32 PM
Never a shortage of rednecks.

paranoia
09-10-2006, 07:13 PM
"bump"

Snow
09-10-2006, 07:15 PM
LOL NECRO NERCO NECRO

Axel
09-10-2006, 08:28 PM
-You stand under the mistletoe at christmas and wait for granny and cousin sue ellen to walk by
-Your family tree doesn't branch out
-Your mother has been involved in a fistfight at a high school sports event
-Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed
-Your home has more miles on it than your car
-Your brother-in-law is your uncle
-The most commonly heard phrase at your family reunion is "What the hell are you looking at, ****head?"
-You have to go outside to get something out of the fridge
-Your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a six-pack
-You've been too drunk to fish
-Someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle
-Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare
-You have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance
-You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos
-Your wife weighs more then your refrigerator
-You mow your lawn and find a car
-If going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.
-Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.
-You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.
-It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it
-You are a redneck if you state you are not a redneck
That's a mighty long list.

Hellraiser
09-10-2006, 08:32 PM
shame, he mite not know wat it means!! LOL = laugh out loud
i am NOT a redneck

but you are african

Snow
09-10-2006, 09:07 PM
That's a mighty long list.

Jeff Foxworthy came up with 100 of them.

Axel
09-10-2006, 09:21 PM
I see. However, you list kinda contradicts every non-redneck, as it says you are a redneck if you say you're not a redneck.

Snow
09-10-2006, 09:33 PM
Oh that one was a joke, I'll take that out.

bassman420
09-11-2006, 09:00 PM
a hundred are you serious man every year he puts out a daily calander with a new one on each page

gussa
09-17-2006, 12:49 AM
he must not get out much.

Moth
09-17-2006, 02:54 PM
When you have a gunrack, on your gunrack.

Axel
09-18-2006, 08:22 PM
When you think sharpening pencils is exciting.

Who Wants Grapes?
09-18-2006, 08:47 PM
When u attack bowling balls claiming that u wanna "get" them before "their" born